Tuesday, March 10, 2009

Rollercoaster endpoint

On a side note, I've somehow gotten another dog ;/ My youngest sister has the penchant for picking up abandoned dogs and now we're seeing Chokoy being jealous of the attention showered upon MeiMei. (Yucks, I know)

Right now I am utterly confused at what I'll be pursuing in my future career. Life has indeed been a rollercoaster ride, which so many veers and changes in it. It's like getting off after the ride has ended and you find yourself at an ending point, different from that of the starting point. I feel kinda aimless and helpless, but the image that God is trudging ahead of me against the storm gives me much comfort. 

Seek, boy. 

Friday, January 30, 2009

Melosweet drama

Been busy writing in my personal diary so I haven't had time for blogging, but well here's a start. Past few days have given me respite to dwell on the things that really matter. I thought about my grandpa whom I dearly miss and I regret not knowing him better when I was a young toddler. He was my favourite grandpa and I was his favourite grandson (according to my aunties). 

It gave me great relief that as I dug through the photos of old to find a single old photograph of him holding my hand and cutting my birthday cake. He was never one for the photos and I was afraid that I would have been unable to find a single photograph of him with me. But God, thank you for that one photograph. 

I know where you are right now and it pains me. I'm sorry I couldn't do anything. But at the same time, I am reminded of what I can still do for those who are living. 

Monday, January 12, 2009

Sadomasochistic

"I know that nothing good lives in me, that is, my sinful nature. For I have the desire to do what is good, but I cannot carry it out. For what I do is not the good I want to do; no, the evil I do not want to do--this I keep on doing." -Paul

Really describes the inner turmoil that we go through when we struggle to do what is right. Seemingly oxymoronic, but so very true. And it brings to me a point, that sometimes as Christians, we might have to be a little sadomachochistic, to choose hardship over pleasure, because often the easier way out tends to be the incorrect way as well. Life is really full of such ironies because I find that when I am given time, I tend to waste time away -.-' 

Been looking through Stomp to see if my picture's up there because while we were doing some ops at Toa Payoh hub, a man took a photo of my section and I, haha. No such luck yet so far, heh.

Another song that I like. ;D

And yea God, thanks man. Your great great mercy never fails. It's as unfailable as my failability, haha.





 

Monday, January 05, 2009

Sequel

A couple of push-ups and chin-ups. Picked up from where I left off on a book and started the flexing of my fingers. I even took down Rubicante from FFIV on my DS, haha. Do hope tomorrow will be more fruitful, but let this be a start. And ima bring down my bike for a well deserved servicing. 

So here's a little song that I like.


Ok, ok

I'm awake now. So...yea let's get this going. Went cycling on Saturday and I kinda enjoyed it despite the quad buster ride up the spiralling slope to the top of the Marina Barrage. Probably time for me to fix up my bike, what with all the damage and all. And that costs $$.  Argh. 

Ok time to exercise. But I think I left my Asics in camp. Ok let's go. 

Sunday, January 04, 2009

Long time no see

It's been a long time since I last blogged. Won't be talking about camp, because I'll be talking about the same old, same old. The New Year marks a new beginning and I haven't really set any New Year resolutions for myself, but I guess I'll take the entire day tomorrow to doing things that my laziness and procrastination has stopped me. 

I find that I could be so much more. Many a times looking back at the errors of my way, the things that took unnecessary time from me, which prevented me from pursuing the things that really mattered. 

It's never too late to be what you might have been. 

I'll be starting my physical training from tomorrow and doing some reading. And more importantly, to rededicate my life back to God once more. 

Friday, December 19, 2008

DISCIPLINE

Weekends being burnt to a crisp as usual.

Everyday has sort of been a struggle for me to choose two paths, to go the extra mile and be unappreciated, or to maintain the status quo. Like polar opposites, they have been tugging at me, as with the many other struggles, like being patient or brash, humble or proud. They have only served to tell me how astounding flawed I am, as I am quickly inclined to be swayed by my fallen nature.

And I just saw this quote which kinda strikes me. "The root of achievement is discipline."

How I lack this discipline.

Monday, November 24, 2008

Chinese Democracy

Chinese Democracy has finally been released. The third album released during my lifetime haha. I am reminded of the time in a music store when a guy was asking the storekeeper if he could preorder Chinese Democracy and the storekeeper just replied in a matter-of-factly way that it could be delayed again because it was supposed to be released ten years ago. Haha.


Not as good as Appetite for Destruction, but it's the hype that matters.

Meaningless

Somehow I find that the richer and more prosperous a nation, the more spiritually-deadened it becomes. That in the drift between physical hardship and the pursuit of our earthly dreams, we come to this half-way house in which we are dissatisfied, but not enough to warrant any delving of the purpose of our existence. Just deep down inside, we know that there is so much more to life, but at the same time, material indicators tell us that we are satisfied, that we should be. And from this hollowed existence, we eke out a wretched livelihood of consumerism, pleasure and violence and reap it's comeuppance of misery.

That while we are able to masterfully map out a wonderful blueprint of what we will do, what we will do and what we will do here, we miss out big on the bigger picture. What if there was more to this life? Have we made plans for that? No matter how colourful out testimonials may be, how illustrious our careers and how profitable our lives, as the author of Ecclesiastes says, "Meaningless! Meaningless!" "Utterly meaningless! Everything is meaningless."

"Yet when I surveyed all that my hands had done and what I had toiled to achieve, everything was meaningless, a chasing after the wind; nothing was gained under the sun."

"The wise man has eyes in his head, while the fool walks in the darkness; but I came to realize that the same fate overtakes them both."

"Then I thought in my heart, "The fate of the fool will overtake me also. What then do I gain by being wise?" I said in my heart, "This too is meaningless.""